CallMeLucky

What is blue? Is it sad? Is it True? Is blue the name for the waves of anxiety that breaks the shore The tide of my moods, the passing of an hou-er What is yellow? Does it make the child smile? Is it as fulfilling as a meal Or does it dim after a while. Is yellow just white gone old? Yellow is age; yellow is mold. What is green? Is it envy? Nature? What does it mean? Does love make us green like a fever for the sick Once you catch love you never get over it Is love the top of the roller coaster: The top before the drop One last gulp of air; one more time for time to stop. What is translucent? Is it even a color? Why worry ab

Trees grow slow. Trees. Grow. Slow. The mantra did nothing. The pressure of a razor over my wrist continued to sting, but I knew it was all my fault. For some reason I was in this situation again… threatening my own life because I didn't want to feel what I was feeling now anymore. I don't know anymore… With the moment gone all I can say is it was like a brain itch. I felt like some gaping wound hung in the air over me bleeding freely and the razor could be used to stitch it all together. That pressure kept the thoughts inside my head so the pain didn't pour out and leave me empty; wishing to be as invisible as my feelings. Incom

(Rekal is based off the word Recalcitrant.  Which is 1.resisting authority or control; not obedient or compliant; refractory. OR 2.hard to deal with, manage, or operate.) I am special she thought to herself.  I was born among a better people because they stronger and cultivated in magic she let her thoughts continue.  Maybe my people are barbarians, but to me they were the inheritors of the earth.  Its because I am destined for greater that school makes no sense. She stared blankly at blank paper.  Ruby, her new name since Rekal was too masculine a name for a towngirl, was supposed to fill between t

It was an old house.  The kind that made noise of its own and it made him feel even more alone to be there. There was a click that came from the kitchen, and then it sounded like someone put something on the counter, but when he crossed the hallway to see who was there he could already tell the noise was just another phantom by the tone of the refrigerator's hum. It wasn't quite out of the ordinary for no one else to be home at 4:00pm so the empty kitchen was quite usual.  It was the placement of a sack lunch on the counter that took him by surprise. For Matthew this was déjà vu.  He had gone to school carrying an identical br

I don't exist in a plane of mist under the stars shouting who you are hoping to be in slavery for only slaves are free. I'm drowning away in a head full of days of thought that tell me to not do as I please because if I do then I will lose my life as it is which is made up of this: Wake up.  Go to school.  Eat.  Homework.  Work.  Freedom.  Sleep. Repeat and repeat.

You'd think I had never seen a human before I met you... I used to stare so                   much and the best times for me                           were the times when you dreamed off                                                                keeping                    your eyes open just for me You'd think that I had never seen something so beautiful how I lost my              words                   every time I had to use the word beautiful when I knew so many more to                                               replace them                                   but I can't replace           you           no

He walked up to the window with a limp and told the nurse in the window "There's nothing wrong with me."  She looked at him for a while, he was supposed to tell her why he needed her help, but if there was nothing wrong... Next thing he knew he was holding a pink paper of the kind that leaves indented marks from the signature of another paper.  Receipt paper.  The security guard eyed him more than anyone else, but why was his signature on this piece of paper? The door opened several times. Time passed.        Names were called. His name was called. He walked in, unsure of why he waited there.  Maybe i

At the library I made friends with a man that could not read.  He was old and the first time he came up to me he asked "Excuse me, but could you do me a favor?"  I was on Facebook hoping a powered computer screen would give the appearance I was busy; and I was busy.  I just had accomplished nothing so far. He wore glasses for no other reason than to show he was old because what he pointed out to me had to be the biggest print I had ever seen in my life.  The book said JAMES PATTERSON.  I couldn't even tell what the title was.  "I'd like you to tell me," I looked around, but he was o

This is my story as an antidepressant. I was once a loner.  I was the kind of person that could be alone in a crowd.  I had trouble sleeping but what else is new?  The turning point might have been when the cutting got out of control.  Razors bent backwards trying to please me, but they couldn't cure me when I couldn't sleep.  I dreamt a lot of suicide.  All the new ways to kill myself had me marveling at how many feelings could just be swallowed.  Over the counter refills kept me going and going, energizer bunny on domesticated medicine hoping the prescribed pills of depression would bring me to death.  My skin closes me in.  People talk ab